Dammit Cat,
Why do you love proving people wrong?
You have had that nifty cat tree for about a year now, but have only gotten onto the top shelf part once before. However, you heard someone say that the top one was such a waste and they didn't think that you even knew about it, you climbed up right then. Is it that the comment jogged your memory? Or do you just like showing off?
Monday, March 28, 2011
Tuesday, March 22, 2011
Natural Order
Dammit Cat,
Wait until I finish taking Cokes out of the box to climb into it. Yes, I understand that the large pallets that have the plastic covering are your favorite things in the whole entire WORLD (as are all forms of boxes, really) but you have to wait.
Similarly, do not act all sweet and cuddly and wait until I'm grabbing the last can to rip open my thumb because suddenly it is play time. After I run off to try and stop the bleeding (which was surprisingly significant) do not then somehow flip the almost empty box and can onto the floor from the washing machine. That can make a hell of a mess.
(Also, on another note I'm going to try to make the updates regular now that I have a stockpile of her weirdness. Updates will come every Monday.)
Wait until I finish taking Cokes out of the box to climb into it. Yes, I understand that the large pallets that have the plastic covering are your favorite things in the whole entire WORLD (as are all forms of boxes, really) but you have to wait.
Similarly, do not act all sweet and cuddly and wait until I'm grabbing the last can to rip open my thumb because suddenly it is play time. After I run off to try and stop the bleeding (which was surprisingly significant) do not then somehow flip the almost empty box and can onto the floor from the washing machine. That can make a hell of a mess.
(Also, on another note I'm going to try to make the updates regular now that I have a stockpile of her weirdness. Updates will come every Monday.)
Wednesday, March 16, 2011
Snobbery
Dammit Cat,
I know that you at least don't hate me as much as you lead on. I happen to know for a fact that you spent the entire day in your cat tree, and came down only when I got home. Granted, you ran over to me and brushed against my leg on your way past before pretending to play in the rug, but I know what it means. Last weekend, you spent an ENTIRE Saturday up on one of the cabinets and came down to brush against my leg before running to lay on top of the printer instead. See, you made a detour (barely) to acknowledge my existence! That means something, right? Right?? And sure you only let me pet you for two seconds before you wander off, but those two seconds are a sign of some sort. And you only are sweet to me when nobody at all is around to see, but... That's... That's you being shy, right..?
....Wait a minute. You give me these tiny gestures of affection, and then rip them away. You.... You're toying with me!
I'm on to you, cat.
I know that you at least don't hate me as much as you lead on. I happen to know for a fact that you spent the entire day in your cat tree, and came down only when I got home. Granted, you ran over to me and brushed against my leg on your way past before pretending to play in the rug, but I know what it means. Last weekend, you spent an ENTIRE Saturday up on one of the cabinets and came down to brush against my leg before running to lay on top of the printer instead. See, you made a detour (barely) to acknowledge my existence! That means something, right? Right?? And sure you only let me pet you for two seconds before you wander off, but those two seconds are a sign of some sort. And you only are sweet to me when nobody at all is around to see, but... That's... That's you being shy, right..?
....Wait a minute. You give me these tiny gestures of affection, and then rip them away. You.... You're toying with me!
I'm on to you, cat.
Sunday, March 13, 2011
Bath Day
Dammit Cat,
This is for your own good.
(She had fleas, and got a bath and a treatment for it. She is currently hoping I die a horrible death, I believe.)
This is for your own good.
(She had fleas, and got a bath and a treatment for it. She is currently hoping I die a horrible death, I believe.)
Monday, March 7, 2011
Jet Dry
Dammit Cat,
What is your fascination with the dishwasher? Why do you climb in it, and only when the dishes are clean?
Is it to rub your cat hair all over the slightly damp dishes, ensuring that we'll find hair stuck to every dish later as we eat?
You don't really do this when the dishes are dirty and going into the dishwasher, which would actually make sense. No, you wait until we pull the rack out and try to walk behind it, into the little cave of wonders back there, walking on and against the newly cleaned cutlery as you go. You also seem to delight in hopping onto the lid of the dishwasher when it is lowered. Please understand that I cannot unload it with you standing there, and do not give me the dirtiest looks that you can when I move you aside to pull the rack out.
Now that we've got that out of the way, maybe we can move onto your pencil stealing addiction....
What is your fascination with the dishwasher? Why do you climb in it, and only when the dishes are clean?
Is it to rub your cat hair all over the slightly damp dishes, ensuring that we'll find hair stuck to every dish later as we eat?
You don't really do this when the dishes are dirty and going into the dishwasher, which would actually make sense. No, you wait until we pull the rack out and try to walk behind it, into the little cave of wonders back there, walking on and against the newly cleaned cutlery as you go. You also seem to delight in hopping onto the lid of the dishwasher when it is lowered. Please understand that I cannot unload it with you standing there, and do not give me the dirtiest looks that you can when I move you aside to pull the rack out.
Now that we've got that out of the way, maybe we can move onto your pencil stealing addiction....
Tuesday, March 1, 2011
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